Quotes

1. Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours. - Yogi Berra
2. Don't be so humble - you are not that great. - Golda Meir (1898-1978) to a visiting diplomat
3. Lady Astor: "Mr. Churchill, you're drunk!" Winston Churchill: "Yes, and you, Madam, are ugly. But tomorrow, I shall be sober."
4. Ask her to wait a moment - I am almost done. - Carl Friedrich Gauss (1777-1855), while working, when informed that his wife is dying
5. A wise man washes his hands after he pees. A wiser man doesn't pee on his hands.
6. "The nice thing about being a celebrity is that if you bore people they think it's their fault." -Henry Kissinger.
7. "The cocktail party is a device for paying off obligations to people you don't want to invite for dinner." -Charles Smith.
8. "Copy from one, it’s plagiarism; copy from two, it’s research."- Wilson Mizner (1876-1933)
9. "The object of war is not to die for your country, but to make the other bastard die for his."- General George Patton (1885-1945)
10. "It is impossible to defeat an ignorant man in argument."- William Gibbs McAdoo (1863-1941)

Before I came to college I wish I had known...

That it didn't matter how late I scheduled my first class, I'd sleep right through it.
That I could change so much and barely realize it.
That you can love a lot of people in a lot of different ways.
That college kids throw airplanes too.
That if you wear polyester everyone will ask you why you're so dressed up.
That every clock on campus shows a different time.
That if you were smart in high school--so what?
That I would go to a party the night before a final.
That chem labs require more time than all my classes put together.
That you can know everything and fail a test.
That you can know nothing and ace a test.
That I could get used to almost anything I found out about my roommate.
That home is a great place to visit.
That most of my education would be obtained outside of my classes.
That friendship is more than getting drunk together.
That I would be one of those people my parents warned me about.
That free food served until 10:00 is gone by 9:50.
That Sunday is a figment of the world's imagination.
That Psychology is really Biology,
That Biology is really Chemistry,That Chemistry is really Physics, and Physics is really Math.
That my parents would become so much smarter in the last few years.
That it's possible to be alone even when you are surrounded by friends
That friends are what makes this place worthwhile!!
Don't be dismayed at goodbyes.
A farewell is necessary before we can meet again, and meeting again, after moments or a lifetime is certain for those who are friends.

SOMEWHERE IN A SCHOOL.....

The board results in English had been pathetic. The otherwise arrogant English teacher had been humbled. The Principal, who had for long developed a disgust for the Eng teacher, ceasing the oppurtunity, gave him a heavy dose. The teacher, feeling insulted, wanted to resign, but could'nt (for obvious reasons). Knowing about the Principal's outburst, the students were on a high and were eagerly waiting for the eng period. It's always a pleasure to see your tormentor getting tormented. When it came, the teaher was greeted with a spirited "good morning sir".
The teacher called up a student to his desk. "What marks did you get ?". "59 Sir". The
teacher, looking for some relief, with his hands and leg made the student realise how bad
his performance was. The spirit in the class died. Another student was called. Same
question. A little different answer ("56 Sir"). Same response. The bashing continued with
replies like "54 Sir, 45 Sir .....".

Next in the line was a bright child.
"What".
"92" ('Sir' missing)
The teacher unleashed his most brutal punches. Student asked "Why sir?". The teacher thought for a while. And then he came up with an answer. "Your handwriting is just pathetic..When will you improve it !".
The next child was not so bright as the previous one (he thanked his stars for that).The
teacher came up with the same deadly question.
"What?"
The student replied "Maariye".
The student was spared.....

Hi...

I am Viprav Anand, a student in Jamshedpur and a highly ambitious person....
Feels great to be in the same league as Amitabh Bacchan and Aamir Khan, though not that popular...But, will get there soon, hopefully